i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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