um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
