Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
