"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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