so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
