I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
