Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
did you just send me my own nude
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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