I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
