PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize