I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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