She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
