new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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