We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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