All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
