Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
