i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize