Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
