Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
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