even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
