I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Randomize
