This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Randomize
