I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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