dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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