see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
