please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
