I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
