they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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