I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
