I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
