so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
