The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
