you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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