I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
