I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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