Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
