My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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