Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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