You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize
