I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize