I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize