Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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