well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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