Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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