she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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