It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
