Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
