if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
whose ass print is on the piano?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
