I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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