sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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