i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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